David Ortiz would like you all to know that today is Truck Day and that he’s gonna take care of things, baby, so don’t you worry.
Jason Varitek would like you to know that pitchers and catchers report in ten days and he’s been spending the offseason organizing his notes into color coded Trapper Keepers with handy, dandy Velcro binding. (The Yankees one is clearly sparkly and pink). And also refilling Matty’s allergy meds.
Manny would like you to know that his favorite color is yellow and duckies say “moo.”
Theo would like you to know that there are not now, nor were there ever, any problems in the front office and he’ll thank you to mind your own business except for when Trauser is playing because then you should totally come out and see them because Trauser RAWKS!
Johnny Damon would like you to know that he misses you already and please don’t boo him and he’ll try real hard not to be too good for the Yankees and why don’t you love him?
Mike Timlin would like you to know that he’s taken care of Johnny Damon.
The Red Sox would like you to know that baseball will be happening soon.
I think I speak for all of us when I say, thank goodness!