Hey, kids. The new InSite is out. I’ve got two columns in this month’s issue including this one, wherein I attempt to break down the AL East by comparing the ERAs of the starting pitching staffs. Yeah, I know, me and the statistical analysis. Not necessarily two great tastes that taste great together. But if you pick it up, there’s also another column in which I use the phrase, “wearing the blood of virgins around his neck on a string of rawhide.” Now if that’s not enough incentive for ya, I don’t know what to tell you.
Is it me, or is Spring Training taking foreeevvvvvvvvvvvvvver this year? Seriously, haven’t we been at this for like eleventy billion years at this point? Or is it just that – knock on wood – things have seemed fairly uneventful? It can’t be that we’re being sane about this. We’re Boston fans. We don’t so much do sane. Still, things seem to be – relatively – under control. That worries me a bit. I suppose it could all be a harbinger of chaos and mayhem once the season starts in earnest. Personally, I’ve only got tickets to two games this season so it’s likely I won’t be causing all of the mayhem my own self. Which doesn’t mean I won’t try. Of course, one of the games I’m going to is Dave Roberts’ return to Fenway. I cannot wait. Can. Not. Wait.
And speaking of Dave Roberts, when I move into my own place in June, I’m planning on getting a cat, preferably a fast one, and naming it Dave Roberts. Even if it’s female. Best idea ever, no? Now, where can I find a fast cat?