Dougie’s Goin’ Deep Tonight: The Revenge

(Photo from Yahoo! Sports)

Okay, honestly, am I being punked here? When I casually mentioned yesterday that Doug Mirabelli might hit another home run in support of his catcher well, I was kidding. Apparently, Dougie doesn’t like jokes. At least I’m not the only one who thinks it’s somewhat absurd. In the postgame, Eck started to mention that at this pace, Dougie’s on track to hit about 20 more home runs this season. But he didn’t quite get the words out before he started laughing along with Tom Caron. I mean, sure, it’s possible. It’s also possible that Tampa Bay might stop playing on a miniature golf course or that A-Rod will continue to hit in October. But it doesn’t seem likely.

That said, credit where credit’s due, I guess. Doug Mirabelli: Stud who hits bombs.

Also, I would like to claim credit for breaking up Tomo Ohka’s no-hitter in the making as, I saw it happening, decided this was not happening again to us this season and promptly sent Marianne a text message, “Tomo Ohka is pitching a no-hitter. A NO-HITTER!” Not fifteen seconds later, Lowell launched his bomb. So you’re all very welcome.

I had a few more observations on last night’s game that I feel compelled to share:

-Are Kevin Youkilis and Jerry Remy sharing hair dye? Because the general consensus is that Remy is dying his hair and Youkilis’ facial hair has taken on a different color of late and I’m just not sure what’s really going on there. Perhaps they’ve tapped into Mike Lowell’s unused supply of “Just for Men.” Not that I want him to use it, mind you. I think Lowell looks great as he is. I remember when Bill Mueller decided to dye his goatee to cover the gray and it just looked so very, very wrong. Like seeing pants on Donald Duck or something. Anyway…

-David Ortiz’s facial hair is especially elaborate this season. Wily Mo, in an effort to be all things Ortiz, looks like he’s trying to replicate it. Only without the benefit of a mirror. Or a light.

-What is it about playing for the Blue Jays that makes one morph into a lumberjack? I mean really, Gregg Zaun, Matt Stairs? And Troy Glaus looks like he’s ready to be fitted for his plaid hunting jacket any day now.

-Is Matsuzaka the only person on the team that Schilling isn’t driving completely insane with his constant yammering? Has to be, right? Must be a language barrier thing.

-“Dougie looks like Spiderman on a high sodium diet with that red and blue catcher’s gear.” – Marianne

-I want a wind machine and possibly a smoke machine, Steve Perry style, on Eck at all times. I think it would really add something to the broadcast.

-Jerry Remy: Matchmaker. By far, the best part of this whole Sox Appeal nonsense is Remy promoting it all season.
Remy: “I think the men are scared, Don, they’re scared of rejection.”
Orsillo: “Could be.”
Remy: “Why don’t you sign up? Oh, you’re married.”
Orsillo: “There’s that.”

And finally, I still think the shift is cheating.

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