So have we all seen this commercial for Nike SPARQ Training? I’ll wait a moment so you can familiarize yourself:
Anyway, ignoring for a second the fact that Jacoby Ellsbury does not appear in the commercial (for shame, Nike) despite endorsing the SPARQ system, the spot did inspire some intense trash-talking between Amy and myself, amateur runners both:
Amy: MY BETTER SMELLS LIKE FRENCH TOAST.
Me: MY FASTER HAS MORE RACCOONS THAN YOUR FASTER.
Amy: MY QUICK IS LIKE THE LAUGHS OF BABIES.
Me: MY STRONGER HAS HORNS AND A TAIL.
Amy: MY AGILITY HAS PIECES OF YOUR AGILITY IN ITS STOOL
Me: MY QUICKNESS TORE DOWN THE BERLIN WALL.
Amy: MY SPEED RAISES OTHER PEOPLE’S SPEED FROM THE DEAD
Me: MY BETTER TASTES LIKE FRESHLY-BAKED PIE.
Amy: MY…okay, I am out of ideas.
Me: Me too. We’re special.
Anyway, this is all by way of saying that when we’re not stressing over the Red Sox or tangentially-related items in front of the television, we’re doing the same while running. Because apparently we’re doing that now. It’s all Katherine’s fault. (Amy: Katherine infected our brains with crack. Me: We need to make Katherine’s Crackheads Running Team t-shirts.) And then there’s Abby who ran the entire damn Boston Marathon.
But my point is, my friends – in addition to being crazy people who like to run – are also altruistic sorts who at least like to run for good causes rather than just ’cause they have some deep-seated masochistic streak (I mean, probably that too). But this is all by way of saying that from time to time, I will be shilling for them and their causes, as well as myself and my own causes. Because you know what’s awesome? Causes.
Currently, Sean is raising money for the New York Junior League’s 4th Annual Mother’s Day Race through Central Park. Money goes to combat domestic violence, a worthy cause – especially on Mother’s day – if ever there was one. So give him some money. Causes need money and one time Sean ran a 5K in Southie on St. Patrick’s Day after consuming half a bottle of Jameson’s the night before. He’s dedicated is what I’m saying.
Personally, I’ve got a couple of 5Ks planned in the next couple of months but the one that might resonate with the Sox fans is the Sharon Timlin Memorial 5K in Hopkinton on June 21 of which all entry fees and donations go towards the Mike and Dawn Timlin-established Angel Fund which is seeking a cure for ALS. So you should donate to that one as well, should you feel so inclined. Or better yet, run it with me. Who’s in? Amy has already committed so you know it’s gonna be a time. We’d love for you to join us. Dudes, Mike Timlin is totally gonna be there and he’ll probably give you a high-five. Won’t that make it all worth it? Thought so.