Monthly Archives: September 2009

More like it


(Photo from Boston.com)

I mean, I know we’re all supposed to be declaring Mark Sanchez super dreamy and just handing the Lombardi Trophy to Rex Ryan and all – since obviously, there’s no need to even play the rest of the games – but personally, I was pleased to see my football team get their heads out of their asses and win a football game in definitive fashion. Even if it wasn’t definitive until after halftime.

Evidently, Brady went all ballistic in the locker room and laid into his receivers – and, according to Tony Dungy who we all know would never lie – also himself. Probably about the dropping and the out-pacing and the poor timing of some of those passes. Also he might’ve thrown a few Gatorade cups at Joey Galloway to see if he was capable of catching, you know, anything.

And yelling is all well and good and I am certainly pro-Tom Brady showing some emotion, but I think maybe he needs to do some trust falls or something with his receivers so they can start getting that timing down and what have you. Also, Chrissy has suggested that they carry a night light to make the red zone less scary to them since clearly, they are TERRIFIED of it.

The thing is, Matt Ryan – while not a local boy exactly – did go to BC so it’s nice to see him doing well. Especially considering the shit show he stepped into down there in Atlanta in the post-Michael Vick era. He’s done well and I think that’s great. (To say nothing of the fact that he’s doing nice things for my fantasy team). But I wasn’t at all sad to see him lose today. He seems like a nice boy, he’ll get over it.

But in the end, the Patriots won the football game and stand at 2-1. And the defense – much maligned of late, by yours truly as well as everyone else – showed some signs of life. So I’ll take it.

Also? Terrell Owens is already acting insane in Buffalo so who had Week 3 in the pool?

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Now Kerry Rhodes will never shut up

(Photo from NFL.com)

The thing is, Randy, you’ve got to hang onto those. Because don’t think I’m not plenty pissed off about this travesty of a football game and the fact that I have to listen to loud-mouthed Jets fans (and players…and coaches) for however long this lasts.

And don’t think I don’t plan on spreading the blame around to all y’all. Like Randy? I believe we’ve covered how you need to hang onto those passes, no? And Thomas? Throwing said passes so they are, in fact, catchable would also be helpful. But mostly, Billiam? You do realize that you are not actually Obi Wan Kenobi and therefore no amount of black magic and hand waving is going to make up for the fact that we NOW HAVE NO DEFENSE, RIGHT? I mean, I presume you know this. I presume you didn’t just trade away Richard Seymour for Oakland’s first round pick in 2011 because you just can’t help yourself from fucking over Al Davis (tempting, I know), and because you actually had a plan. Because if you somehow thought that the defense featuring NONE OF THE FOLLOWING: Bruschi, Harrison, Hobbes, Izzo, Vrabel or Seymour was going to stop anyone then I think you may have overestimated your own power.

Now look, Bill. I get it. You’re you. I trust you in most things and I’ll admit that it’s not outside the realm of possibility that you somehow engineered this loss so that you could spend the next few weeks kicking your player’s asses up and down the field to keep them from being overconfident. And if that’s it, well then…fine, I guess. If it works, more power to you.

But what about me, Billiam? What about all the bullshit I have to listen to? Billiam, I live with a Jets fan. In a very small apartment. (I mean, to his credit, he is very kind and not the kind to make with the rubbing one’s face in this kind of thing but still). What am I going to do? You didn’t even consider me, did you? And after all I’ve done for you…

Also, Mark Sanchez is totally going to eclipse Peyton Manning for quarterback to appear in the most commercials per broadcast, isn’t he? Greeeeat. Super.

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Aaaaaand…exhale

(Photo from Boston.com)

Um, we, as a country, might want to get on that health care thing soon. Because if the Patriots persist in these kind of last minute, we’re going to win, oh wait, no we’re not. Oh hang on a second MAYBE OUR KICKER WILL RECOVER A FUMBLE and then we’ll do some acrobatics and Ben Watson will catch a touchdown except it’s under review but NO wait it IS a touchdown and then we won’t make the two-point conversion because that’d be too easy or something and what is with these fifteen-thousand laterals and oh my god is the game over? And we won? REALLY? – then we, as a region, are going to be making multiple trips to the emergency room with cardiac issues and it’d be really nice to know that was covered by our healthcare providers.

I’m looking out for the people is what I’m saying.

I’m also one-hundred and twenty-three percent sure that Tedy Bruschi attempted to rip off his suit coat and tie and rush the field to help the Patriots defense at least four times during the course of the game. And he’s probably maybe rethinking this whole retirement thing right now. Especially with Jerod Mayo’s injury. Because, sure, why not, right?

Admittedly, when Buffalo went up 24-13, I snapped the TV off, angrily declared that football is a stupid sport anyway and stuck my nose in a book. It’s a new thing I’m trying, with the anger management and what not. It wasn’t working either. Then Greta texted me to tell me to turn the game back on. And then…that happened. I should have known better. I really, really should have known.

And now, now I’m afraid I need to go lie down.

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One of a Kind

(Man, I’m going to miss that)

NESN.com has my take on Tedy Bruschi’s retirement. Except that, of course, I left out the part about all the power ballads I’ve been listening to – specifically Nilsson’s “Without You” and that part of Air Supply’s “Making Love out of Nothing At All” when they inexplicably start belting about “making every tackle at the sound of the whistle and making all the stadiums rock.” Which, I’m sorry, is kind of awesome.

Also, I’ve got a daily gig at NESN.com for the time being. A couple posts every day on Red Sox or Red Sox related people. You can find them here (link also on sidebar) and it should update daily.

Further also, I’m still training for that marathon I foolishly decided to run (foolish because I’ve taken to making like Varitek after long runs and encasing my knee joints in ice), and with committed funds, I’m up to $3400! That’s only $1600 short of my goal with just under two months to go. I don’t know, kids. I think I might actually make it. If you’ve already made a donation, you rock and I am eternally grateful. If you haven’t yet and you’d like to, the donation link is here or on the sidebar. And if you’re just sending along well wishes, that’s appreciated too.

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